STEVE! GOD OF SPAZZY PEOPLE IV: STEVE'S CAR!

"Hmmm..." Steve said looking through a car magazine.
"Oh god Steve, dont tell me tha-" Ica started
"Yeah Ica, I'm planning to buy a car."
Ica's mouth dropped open. She sat in her chair in shock. Steve turned a page, and the sound made Ica come to.
"We're all dead..." she muttered under her breath.
Steve looked up. "Cut me some slack, okay?"
"YOU CAN'T EVEN DRIVE A CAR!"
Steve reached into his pocket and took out his wallet. He pulled out his driver's licsnce and showed it to Ica. Steve's picture was of him, his brown hair a mess, face painted black and white, and his eyes were blood-shot. "I got a licence."
"YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'RE DRUNK!"
Steve looked at it. "True, I do look drunk."
Ica started to dust the arms of the chairs with her duster. "Get a new licence." She suggested.
"THERE IS NO WAY I AM GOING TO THE DMV! NO WAY WILL I EVER STEP FOOT IN THERE AGAIN!" Steve blurted out rahter loud. A loud roll of thunder could be heard in the distant clouds. Rain poured down and lightning flashed in the sky, striking the clouds and the ground under them.
"I'm just saying th-"
Volcanoes erupted from bellow. The wind blew and Steve's hair was lifted up. His eyes flashed to a pure white with red veins crawling their way around on the white.
"I'm ju-"
The earth shook and cracked open. Tidal waves formed in the center of the Atlantic and Pacific and moved towards the shore at an increadible pace. Hurricanes formed around the continents, and the ice caps began to melt, and the forests in Canada caught ablaze.
"I-"
Steve's skin turned pale, and all over him, his blue venins turned black and were visable everywhere. White streaks formed in his hair. Tornados formed in Europe and the sun blacked out. The moon closed in on the earth, and chicken wings rained from the sky. Out of the heavens and the cracks in the earth, spirits apeared and started a dance of the dead.
"I'M JUST SAYING YOU SHOULD GETA NEW PICTURE!"
Steve didn't listen. It was hopeless. It was over for the human race. Everything seemed to be coming to an end. From all over, death was in front of the human's eyes.
Ica sighed. "I'll give you five dollars and a slurpee if you go to the DMV to get a new pciture."
Then everything stopped. Then everything seemed to rewind back to it's original state. "I'LL TAKE IT!" Steve yelled, back to normal, taking the money out of Ica's hands.
Ica sighed. And so she drove Steve to the DMV.

Steve looked at the cars at the car place. Steve looked in awe at the Hummers.
"How 'bout this Steve?" Ica asked him pointing a punch-buggie.
"No! Let's get this!" Steve said excited pointing to an H3 Hummer. "Cough up the money sister!"
"I'm not your sister!"
"That's how the people in Jersey, I mean, 'Joysey' talk 'round here sister. Now gimme deh money! I got de buisness with the auto dealers!

After the long time waiting, Steve had gotten his Hummer, for some thousand dollars. Steve was on a roll driving down the street.
"I can't believe you caused me to use my credit card..." Ica despaired.
"It's only a few hundred thousand dollars!" Steve said happily. Ica moanned. "Hey, let's get some Burger King!"
Steve drove up to the drive-thru. "Welcome to Burger King, may I take your order?"
"Yeah, get me a quad-stacker, extra bacon, and a extra large vanilla shake with that. And can ya get me a double stacker with a chocolate shake?
"That will be $10.52. Please pull up to the second window."
It was confusing to Steve when they said "second window." There was only one window. Anyway, Steve got there to the "second window." The young teenage girl held his bags of food for him. "H3r3'$ y0ur f00d d00d3!" She said.
Steve sat there in shock. "What?"
She repeated it. "H3r3'$ y0ur f00d d00d3!"
"I'm sorry, but I don't speak fan-girl."
"Me neither!" Ica said next to Steve.
"D00d3, t@k3 y0ur f00d n0w! 1 g0t @ j0b 2 g3t 2!"
Steve sat there in shock. "IN ENGLISH! BEFORE I DRIVE MY HUMMER IN THERE!"
"Don't Steve..."
"D00d3, my b0$$ will pwn y0ur n00b @$$ s0 f@$t, y0u'11 b3 1n h311!"
"THAT'S IT!" Steve yelled. He turned left, pushed on the gas, and drove through the drive-thru window. He drove over everything in sight, as the people dropped their food and ran! Steve drove over the burgers and fries. He drove over ketchup packets and shot ketchup everywhere. When, the Burger King was destroyed, as in a pile of rubble and nothin' left, he sighed. "That felt good!"
Ica sat there in awe. She was frozen in here seat.
"Let's get going before the cops show." And so Steve drove his hummer into the sky, sat on his couch, and watched some cheap kaiju* movies.

* Kaiju are japaneese monster movies, like Godzilla and Gameron.