IDIOT SIGHTING: Gene and I had to have the garage door repaired. The
Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not
have a "large" enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and
said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time a 1/2
horsepower. He shook his head and said, "Lady, you need a 1/4
horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, "NO,
it's not. Four is larger than two." We haven't used Sears repair
since.

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IDIOT SIGHTING: I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new
neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the
removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "Too many
deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good
place for them to be crossing anymore." From Kingman , KS

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IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and
ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal 
lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg. He was a
Chef? Yep...From Kansas City!

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IDIOT SIGHTING: I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an
airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage
without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my
knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's
why we ask." Happened in Birmingham , Ala.

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IDIOT SIGHTING: The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to
cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged
coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I
explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing
driving?!" She was a probation officer in
Wichita , KS

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IDIOT SIGHTING: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker.
She was leaving the company due to "downsizing." Our manager commented
cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another
word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that
deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.

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IDIOT SIGHTING: I work with an individual who plugged her power strip
back into itself and for the sake of her own life, couldn't understand
why her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County
Sheriffs office no less.

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IDIOT SIGHTING: When my husband and I arrived at an automobile
dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked
in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working
feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the
passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered
that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician,
"its open! His reply, "I know - I already got that side." This was at
the Ford dealership in Canton, Mississippi

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STAY ALERT! They walk among us -- and they REPRODUCE!!!