Many legends exist about famous pirates, their curses, their adventures, their feats of great danger. But none of these legends mention a clear legendary captain. Captain Roy England. Also known as the man who did so much, yet knew very little of the effects of his actions. He changed the world and didn't care. His only concern? Whether or not a port had a good pub.

Our story begins with Roy England rotting in a colonial prison cell. His clothes tattered and dirtied from weeks of "Royal hospitality" and his hair was a mess too. "Captain Roy England!" shouted a voice. The captain stood up to watch as a soldier carrying a musket came to his cell door. "The governon would like to speak with you in his chambers, but first you have a guest, a female guest," said the soldier with a sly grin. "Quite a lovely number she is, I bet she has some firm parts hehehe."

Roy was glad to see the soldier leave as a lovely young woman with violet hair took his place before the cell. She slid his slender hands through the bars and clasped them over his, but in a deep voice said "The lads are ready to take the ship, have you met with the governor yet?" asked the woman who was actually a man in disguise.
Roy smirked, his first mate was quite the clever one. "Not yet, coincidentally the guard just informed me that I am to meet him after I've finished with you," he stated. The violet haired man stepped back, standing in full light. He clearly looked like a woman despite the evident fact of his voice and facial bone structure, which was well concealed by make-up. "Well then, I guess I shall be off to inform the men," he turned to walk away but was stopped by the sound of Roy clearing his throat. "What?" asked the first mate. Roy grinned evilly, "What no kiss?" he asked jokingly, and sent the cross-dresser storming off down the hall.

A few hours, and a warm bath, later...

Captain Roy England was taken to the Governor's mansion, located just up the hill from the prison. He was greeted well by the workers in the plantation and even better by the women who worked inside the luxurious esate. It was a typical 17th century style manor, complete with interior decorating and staff. The governor, who seemed too fat for his own good, was smiling contently as Roy entered his chambers. His pudgy face could be seen scrunching behind his dwarfed desk. "So, Captain, I hear you are due to meet with the gallows. I'm sure you do deserve it," he said with a smug look on his chunky face. Roy wanted nothing more than to stomp on the lard and send him to Davey Jones' Locker. But he urged through the anger and smiled politely, "Yes, I guess it is my time," he replied calmly. The governor leaned forward and laughed loudly, "It doesn't have to be, you could work for me. I could pardon you of your crimes, if..." he trailed off, leaving Roy to inquire further. "If what, sir?" he asked. The governor grunted as he stood up, his stomach jiggling as he approached Roy. "If you were to come under my employ and pirated for me. You would be of great aid to the Queen if we used you against her enemies." Roy smiled and put on his best fake appreciative look, "You are too kind sir, if that's the case then I would be glad to work for you."
The governor, apparently expecting the answer, shook Roy's bound hands. "Good, in the morning you will meet your crew and your new ship."  Roy was quickly taken from the room and given a thorough cleaning.

After a quiet and peaceful night, in a comfortable bed, with a comfortable woman, and a comfortable bottle of rum, he was prepared. Prepared to make a deal with the devil, the Navy. He found himself quickly escorted from his room at the inn, leaving behind all of those comfortable inn, and to the harbor. A long line of sailors stood along a very short pier, in front of a rather small ship. Inwardly Roy was throwing a temper tantrum, how badly he wanted to really kick and scream to show his displeasure. He was being gyped by the governor. But as the saying goes, one kind turn deserves another. At the thought he began chuckling, making the soldiers escorting him feel rather uneasy in his legendary presence.

As the smell of the sea filled the air, a wave of comfort overcame Roy. Hopefully his first mate had pulled off their plan. It was almost a week ago when he had to come Roy with the governor's plans. It was so simple-minded. All they had to do was wait, and the opportunity would come to them. His first mate was great at getting information, and wasn't fickle about the method of doing so. That was wait made him Quils of a Thousand Ambiguities.

Now was the time. With a  heavy grunt he shouldered one of the guards, sending the man to the ground, and began sprinting towards the pier. "The prisoner is escaping!" shouted the remaining soldiers as they readied their muskets, aiming them at Roy's back. The men on the pier quickly formed up with their rifles, aimed at Roy as well. Roy was trapped between the two, checkmate. Suddenly a voice of familiar volume called out, "Ready," it was his first mate, "FIRE!".  Without second-guessing, Roy dove onto the ground just in time to avoid the volley of musket balls as they soared past him and peppered the royal soldiers, wounding two and killing one of them. As if on cue, the men who fired from the pier off the royal uniforms to show off their individual styles of pirate flair as their  new captain rose to his feet. A man with violet hair stood at the bow of the ship wearing a wild grin. "Quils, you dog." muttered Roy as he made his way past the crew and up the gangplank.

Quickly the crew readied the ship, the royal garrison of Eten port would soon be on them. Quils barked out the orders as Roy began tailoring the royal uniform he was made to wear, using only a knife. He could hear The steady stomps of the soldiers as they came near the harbor. He had no clue what to do next, the entire escape plan was crafted by Quils. He looked at his first mate, dressed so regal with a pair of sabers at one side. The man was frightening in any situation if it came down to it, but he looked so much like a woman that this trait was underlying. "A SHIP!" shouted several scattered voices. Roy was quick to run to the front of the ship. Not far off a large naval boat could be seen sailing towards them. "Damnit," cursed Roy as he looked back at Quils. "We're going to have to do something drastic."

This is my first attempt at writing a Pirate story, so if anyone can help with ship terminology please feel free to help.

Stay tuned for the next entry.