Valence Night: Chronicle of a Lost Knight

Chapter 4: Full of it

            Wow, we’re like on top of the world!” exclaims Ohryea as she dances on her toe. Both Valence and she arrive to the main gate. “A beautiful hot spring yesternight and now we’re staying in one of the four kingdoms, what more is there for such a romantic setting? I’m surprised we got lost and got lucky finding a place to bathe.”

            “Technically speaking, I will be staying in the palace,” Valence spins himself to Ohryea, “so you are getting second class while I get the royal treatment,” he nudges his elbow at Ohryea while her cheerful moment slowly becomes grumpy, “That’s ok though since I won’t be able to do anything with so many nobles eyeing at me, and for all I know, the Armad- the head of this entire kingdom- will more than likely be there, so no funny business with the missy missies; I’m still all yours, doll.”

            “Blah blah blah. Do you know you’re full of it? Chances are you’ll be stomped to death at the royal meeting by looking at the LADIES wrong. Pow pow thump thump!” Ohryea verbally expresses the sound effects of Valence getting beaten while showing him the punches and foot stomps. “And I bet the nobles are a bunch of bellowing boars and swine. I’m sure a lassie her size can drown you between her sweaty bosoms,” Ohryea squeezes her arms against her chest and sways herself left and right while pouting her cheeks. “Mmm sir, deed mah blubberin’ chest ate you alive?”

            “That’s not how nobles sound like; they are more elegant. That’s dumb. You’re dumb. They sound more like…Oof!” before Valence can finish, Ohryea holding out her strength, hammers her right fist into his gut.

“Well I’m sorry for not being raised properly, meh. I worked my little fingers to death back then. Oh, I should get nails done while I’m there and some cream for my skin.”

“We are almost to the front. Don’t make me look bad before I even get to the proposition, or otherwise the only dancing you’ll be doing is begging for coppers on the street,” Valence does the monkey dance. Ohryea quiets herself down and kicks Valence’s shin lightly. “We’ll get you the best lotion and nail paints when we get there, ok?”

"La lala la," Ohryea sings out loud as the two approach the leather armored gate gaurds.