VIEWS TODAY: 4
VIEWS TOTAL: 267
POPS: 12
CLIPS: 3
COMMENTS: 22
REVIEWS: 0
ADDED: 01.10.2008
AVG RATING: 5.0
TOTAL RATING: 2
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Old Love
On the streets on a cold New York night lays a man, a lonely man. He sits in solotude,all alone he sits. As he sits he ponders about his life. Wondering if he made a mistake in his life. He begins to hear a *THUMP* *THUMP* *THUMP*. As he wonders about his life he begins to think to himself "why am i here" "what did i do to deserve my lonelyness". *THUMP* *THUMP* *THUMP*, he thinks "how am i at this point in my life were i dont have a family nore a loved one"? "THUMP" "THUMP" "THUMP". *He rises in his hight of curiousity*. "What do i have to live for"? "I have nothing". He begins to amerge from his desalite chair and walks toward the door. The door creecked with mockery "rrrrree" saying to him that even the door had no feelings for him. His hopes were like a broken glass, shatered on the floor. He walks down his desolate hallway. Continuing down the dreaed stares. To edmerge at a plain white depressing door. As he turns the handle, he pushes on the dirty door. The door swings open from his shear force. As he enters he pulls open the curtins. As the light shines in it reveals a dank dark basement shelf. The shelf is riddled with pill bottles. The bottles are imprinted with the names of dozons of people. As he stares at himself in a hanging mirror ajasint to the door he notices that he has a odd smile opon his face. This did not puzzle him for his worries would soon be over. Or so he thought.
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keept me intreseted
i really liked it!!!!
i really liked it!!!!
i love it!! completely ^^ i wasn't bored not once!!! .......... is it wrong that i want him to drink those pills! ^~^ ...i just can't help it tragic endings are soooo beautiful!! ^-^
Awesome^^ *pop*
I really like it
luv it! *pop* write some more! it's really good so far!
more please!!*pop*
O.O *mouth drops*.............OMG!! DAT WAS GOOD!!!! I WANNA READ MORE!! :D *pop/clip*
*SCREAMS AT THE COMPUTER* NNOO!!!! DON'T DIE!!! DON'T OVERDOSE!!! DON'T KILL URSELF!!!!!!!!!! NNNOOOO!!!! (p.s. i want the next chapter!! lol)
Wow. i really enjoyed that. It's weid, but awesome.
0.0 write some more for your fans!!!! *pop* *clip* *love*
That was really good i loved it! It had alot of detail but their was 1 spelling error torwards the end but great work! *pop*
i cant wait to read it.
Wonderful use of description! Watch you spelling but I can really talk on that point. Don’t be afraid to use more compound sentence it will help I flow a bit better and draw he audience in more. Oh and try to use different adjective and things like that like you have wonder and wondering with in a sentence of each other if you word I just a bit different it wont sound like your repeating you self such as Wondering if he made a mistake in his life. He begins to hear a *THUMP* *THUMP* *THUMP*. Looking back at his life he begins to think to himself "w…but honestly good job overall nice ending to I can’t wait to see more^-^
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Chapter One: The Loney Man