Well i'm back...not by choice but i'm back home. I spent the past week with my beautiful wife to be Tasha and I can say that leaving was the hardest thing that I ever had to do.

After such a great week of cuddles, kisses, holding hands, just being able to act like a couple should do for the past week, I can safely say that it was the best experience of my life, so for it all to end so quickly was deeply upsetting.

We did a lot of things over the week, but mainly it involved us snuggling up and being able to embrase her made me feel special. I kept some things from the trip like movie ticket stubs, a ticket from the ferris wheel that we went on, little things that mean the whole world to me. Tasha gave me one of her bandanas and a half used tub of her lip gloss. Stuff like this may seem very trivial to some but to me i'm very sentimental and it's just so hard everytime I smeel the gloss or smell her sweet scent on her bandana I break down and cry. The one thing we both agree on is that it's not as easy as we thought it was going to be...saying goodbye...in fact I refused to say goodbye and told her not to say it either. If we said goodbye it'd feel as though we were saying goodbye for good, so we just said I love you and I cuddled...and I never ever wanted to let go.

I really wished I could have stayed even for just another week...I'm going to return later on this year or maybe towards the beginning of next year, either way i'm returning. I can't be without her.

Tasha you're my best friend, my lover and my wife to be, I love you with all my heart, body and soul and I really miss you...I feel as though a part of my life has been taken away from me...in fact I feel alone...It's so hard writing this because I think about all the good times we had during the past week. I can't comprehend not being with you now because I know what i'd be missing if we didn't...

I love you...I love you...I love you so much...I find this very hard to write so for now i'm going to stop...I just want to sleep because I feel pain in heart and in my stomach. I feel sick without her being by my side and I just don't know what I can do.

Maybe when I get used to everything again i'll write a more uplifting blog, but for now I feel...heartbroken...love sick...and lonely...I love you Tasha...my Bunny...my wife...